{"product_id":"the-business-goose-mug","title":"The \"Business Goose\" Mug","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCorporate culture loves insisting on strict dress codes,\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e as if squeezing into formal tailoring somehow bestows strategic brilliance upon someone who spends half their day struggling with a paper jam.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Enter the penguin:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e nature’s ultimate suit-and-tie middle manager.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Featuring an illustration of a tuxedo-clad penguin paired with its true,\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e unembellished classification—\"Business Goose\"—this mug honors anyone forced to dress up,\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e stand in a cold room,\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e and waddle through corporate bureaucracy with zero ability to fly away.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eKeep it front and center during C-suite presentations to remind yourself that under all those sharp blazers, stiff collars, and performance metrics, everyone is just an oversized, flightless waterfowl flapping their wings in unison.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eThe Specs (Since someone is bound to ask):\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e11oz Capacity:\u003c\/b\u003e Holds enough caffeine to power you through endless corporate waddling and flightless status meetings.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eHigh-Quality White Ceramic:\u003c\/b\u003e Smooth, solid, and vastly more comfortable than your company’s mandatory \"business casual\" guidelines.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMicrowave \u0026amp; Dishwasher Safe:\u003c\/b\u003e Because doing manual kitchen cleanup while wearing formal attire is absurd; spending energy handwashing dishes is strictly off the table.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003ePermanent, Vibrant Print:\u003c\/b\u003e The dapper penguin graphic and executive rebrand won't wear off, no matter how icy the workplace climate gets.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDimensions:\u003c\/b\u003e 96mm tall and 80mm wide. Perfectly proportioned to clutch while standing around looking very important in the breakroom.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003ci\u003eSuit up and waddle. Add to Cart.\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Snark Attack Co.","offers":[{"title":"Ceramic Yellow","offer_id":50866500730928,"sku":"ff69afb7-ad4c-4cab-abe7-33482ec705a0","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Pink","offer_id":50866500763696,"sku":"d8f61b19-627d-4eb1-9661-e3fdb9d23ca4","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Green","offer_id":50866500796464,"sku":"8cd07a36-53b5-4fa3-98f0-deb61b896c22","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Red","offer_id":50866500829232,"sku":"935a1e93-bb4d-4bf7-9b71-1474871711bf","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Black","offer_id":50866500862000,"sku":"f207f66b-c541-4c91-83fc-4bc2c648da22","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Blue","offer_id":50866500894768,"sku":"672e476c-0d10-44a4-8c16-85f6cb15292f","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0788\/9328\/5424\/files\/076727f7-af65-4214-85f6-1002c8171905.png?v=1792984187","url":"https:\/\/snarkattackco.com\/products\/the-business-goose-mug","provider":"Snark Attack Co.","version":"1.0","type":"link"}