{"product_id":"the-existential-relief-mug","title":"The \"Existential Relief\" Mug","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCorporate culture loves framing missed deadlines and frantic pings as life-or-death emergencies.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e But when your heart rate spikes over an unformatted spreadsheet,\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e true peace comes from zooming out to the grand cosmic timeline.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Featuring an illustration of a stressed worker hunched over their keyboard paired with the ultimate perspective reset—\"When work feels overwhelming,\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e remember that you're going to die.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\"—this mug is dedicated to morbidly grounding your daily priority list.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eKeep it front and center during Q4 budget reviews, or sip dark roast from it whenever someone marks a completely routine email as \"URGENT: HIGH PRIORITY\" at 4:45 PM on a Friday.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eThe Specs (Since someone is bound to ask):\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e11oz Capacity:\u003c\/b\u003e Holds enough caffeine to keep your heart beating through another soul-crushing status update.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eHigh-Quality White Ceramic:\u003c\/b\u003e Solid, durable, and guaranteed to outlast your tenure (and life expectancy) at this company.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMicrowave \u0026amp; Dishwasher Safe:\u003c\/b\u003e Because obsessing over manual kitchen chores when mortality is looming is strictly off the table.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003ePermanent, Vibrant Print:\u003c\/b\u003e The graphic of desk-bound despair and ultimate cosmic truth won't fade away before your career does.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDimensions:\u003c\/b\u003e 96mm tall and 80mm wide. Ergonomically shaped to clutch tightly during severe existential crises.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003ci\u003eGain perspective. Add to Cart.\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Snark Attack Co.","offers":[{"title":"Ceramic Yellow","offer_id":50865987518512,"sku":"64a039d9-a478-41c7-8445-1d903a26b147","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Pink","offer_id":50865987551280,"sku":"d38eecbf-e33b-400e-a08d-68372b31feed","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Green","offer_id":50865987584048,"sku":"a009a170-ace8-423f-b795-c4fe17b558e4","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Red","offer_id":50865987616816,"sku":"6d677eb6-2bc4-4ddf-9d0c-29a50c811cb5","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Black","offer_id":50865987649584,"sku":"1d0af170-3d54-4bb9-9545-20f95c020430","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Blue","offer_id":50865987682352,"sku":"ac92b0e6-090b-445d-a71d-ff3325bb79c3","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0788\/9328\/5424\/files\/a2df20b1-4010-47ad-8ced-801d48e15155.png?v=1792969656","url":"https:\/\/snarkattackco.com\/products\/the-existential-relief-mug","provider":"Snark Attack Co.","version":"1.0","type":"link"}