{"product_id":"the-low-expectations-mug","title":"The \"Low Expectations\" Mug","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDisappointment isn't caused by bad luck—it's caused by high standards.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e If you walk into every room expecting people to be competent,\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e organized,\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e or self-aware,\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e you are setting yourself up for endless heartbreak.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Featuring a gauge needle pegged firmly below absolute zero and the ultimate philosophy for peace of mind—\"The key to happiness is low expectations.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Lower...\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Nope.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Even lower...\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e There you go.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\"—this mug is your daily reminder to bury the bar so deep in the dirt that basic survival feels like a massive victory.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eKeep it on your desk during project kickoffs, or sip from it while quietly accepting that \"adequate\" is the absolute highest grade anyone around here is going to achieve.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eThe Specs (Since someone is bound to ask):\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e11oz Capacity:\u003c\/b\u003e Holds enough caffeine to sustain you when doing the absolute bare minimum is the highest ambition available.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eHigh-Quality White Ceramic:\u003c\/b\u003e Smooth, solid, and built to a much higher standard than your expectations for the rest of humanity.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMicrowave \u0026amp; Dishwasher Safe:\u003c\/b\u003e Because striving for extra manual effort in the kitchen is setting expectations way too high; handwashing dishes is strictly off the table.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003ePermanent, Vibrant Print:\u003c\/b\u003e The zeroed-out gauge graphic and relentless pessimism won't wear off, no matter how many times someone lets you down.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDimensions:\u003c\/b\u003e 96mm tall and 80mm wide. Perfectly proportioned to hold while watching the bar drop even lower.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003ci\u003eLower the bar. Add to Cart.\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Snark Attack Co.","offers":[{"title":"Ceramic Yellow","offer_id":50865818959920,"sku":"6c5c2b9a-6d54-4e66-8f94-3109623c722c","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Pink","offer_id":50865818992688,"sku":"6562d566-eabb-4f38-ac20-f71068edaa69","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Green","offer_id":50865819025456,"sku":"0800b0d1-a818-4fee-a1e0-c7030e353615","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Red","offer_id":50865819058224,"sku":"2b30718d-df64-44e1-89d2-384e42e5903d","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Black","offer_id":50865819090992,"sku":"5741ac31-7b7d-4026-bd0b-a911b17e0542","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ceramic Blue","offer_id":50865819123760,"sku":"8b51d8aa-bc1f-476e-a19b-34f7b652d946","price":14.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0788\/9328\/5424\/files\/8255efbb-13f6-49ae-bd4b-f215ddcddbef.png?v=1792976061","url":"https:\/\/snarkattackco.com\/products\/the-low-expectations-mug","provider":"Snark Attack Co.","version":"1.0","type":"link"}